Let Your Loss Be Your Lesson

Hi! I am Shruti Gupta and I will be writing as Guest Blogger for Tasneem as she is too busy fasting as well as feasting!

The summer of 2009 was the hardest, most challenging yet the most eventful and memorable month of my life. I went for GYLC. I lived on my own for a month and a half, something I thought would be easy to do with absolutely no nagging and lecturing. However, it wasn’t until I was thrown in with 200 other people from around the world did I realize that I had taken people around me for granted all my life. I missed home, I missed seeing a familiar face around, I missed being woken up in the morning to yelling, I hated being lost in the crowd, I hated the fact that the people around me, the people I befriended could probably just be posers and I would never know, I hated tearing up when I heard a familiar voice, I hated counting down days to when I would be on a plane back home and I hated the fact that such things actually have a huge impact on me and get the better of me and all I could do was try to smile bravely, which failed me quite often. However, now that I am back home, I miss the experience, I miss the friends I made, I miss the places I saw and I miss the moments I missed out on. It’s hard being regretful.

When I was there I vowed to myself that I would come back and appreciate the people around me and I would enjoy things rather than mourn about them. I guess old habits die hard because I’m back to cribbing about school, the workload, the incessant nagging at home and the never ending lectures. And the worst part of it all? I know I have less than a year to enjoy all of this because in a year once again I’ll be living with people I don’t know, in a place which is unfamiliar to me, far far away from home. I know I won’t be meeting a lot of my friends again and in spite of that I don’t seem to cherish it all. Is it just being juvenile or am I just not trying hard enough? Whatever it is, it’s hard to shake off the horrid feeling of not being thankful for what I have.

My loss was my lesson which I seemed to have learnt nothing from.